Blessing.

In my last post, I was angry, I was mad, I want to yell at people, I want to cry because of too much hurt inside. Hindi ko alam kung anong nanagyari, pero okay na ako ngayon, kalmado lang, tahimik na ang isip.

I became so unfair to God, akalain mo, ang pinansin ko eh yung galit at lungkot at hindi yung blessing na ibinigay sa akin just yesterday. If you could remember my post last week, that I even mentioned that only one person knows about it and will tell publicly if it's final... yes, i am ready to share.

I GOT PROMOTED from Recruitment Staff to Career Placement and Alumni Officer!! Ang galing lang, I mean, ang weird rather, hindi naman sa petix ako sa work, I just enjoy what I'm doing na parang naglalaro lang ako everyday, but with output of course. I never expected that it is me whom they will choose, kasi during the past week, I was advise to hire somebody for the similar position, but then, they decided to choose me instead since I've done the basics of it, yun lang, sabi nga, with higher position comes greater responsibility.

Last sunday, I went to mass alone, even if it's early, i woke up just to attend the mass and that rarely happens. Anyway, nung Friday, pinahapyawan na ako ng boss ko that there is a plan for me, though, it's not yet finalized, sabi ko kay God, "KUNG HINDI PARA SA AKIN YUN AT KUNG HINDI KO KAYA, HINDI IYON MAFFINALIZE", blah blah blah. Then nagiimagine ako na what if natuloy, anong mga projects ang sisimulan ko, etc. Assuming? hindi naman, I just want to vision myself in that position. Kung hindi mafinalize, no hard feelings, eh yun ang plano sa akin ni God, maybe some other time.

Monday, Kinausap ako ng masinsinan, and NA FINALIZE ang plan for me. I got happy, excited and sad at the same time. Sad kasi, sobrang malapit sa akin ang mga tao dito, and since ililipat na ako ng office, department, siyempre, malungkot.

Sinabi ko iyon kay mama through text and she was so happy and proud of me, text pa lang yun ah, Nung nagkita kami, nanlambot ako kasi umiyak si mama sa tuwa. (talaga kahit na nasa grocery kami??) Haha. who cares. Bawing bawi daw siya sa akin kasi siya, before daw maging officer, it took her 15 years, blah blah.

Sabi ko nga kay Lord even nung college pa lang ako, gusto ko kumita ng malaki laki, kasi gusto kong mas makatulong kay mama, yung may maiabot pa ako para sa expenses namin, may mabili siya sa sarili niya, o ako mismo mabilan siya na ikasasaya niya, etc. Yun ang nasa utak ko at hindi pang sarili, well I guess God is so generous at magagawa ko na iyon. I could save more for my future. Jusko Mag-25 na ako dapat iniisip ko na ang pamilya, ano papakain ko sa anak ko, magka sariling kotse, bahay. Haha.

Hay thank you so much Lord kahit na ang sama ng ugali ko, you still gave my wish=,) Nakakaiyak naman. Salamat Lord! Salamat!